how am I not supposed to know?

I didn't realize having these what people called mental disorder thingie until I finally find myself being on the top rank of LOST TRACK mind last few hours. I think this is quite serious. I was worried.
But the worst of all the worseness was that I did not realized that I have been the LOST TRACK-er because of the extremely silly and creepiest reason. Of all the reasons in the world, I can't believe that I can be too weak to put those silly thoughts and making it such a pain in ar*e.

I swear I am not gonna let that be a crap in my head, an obstacle of my sight, and NO way it is gonna be the DISTRACTIVE BARRIER. I swear to GOD. Not a million years.

I am not used to be such a loser. I am definately not. Hence, what's that suppose to mean?? Yes. I am so gonna FIGHT. I'm gonna be a fighter. Back again. This is me. The real Hana is back on track. Nobody will ever taken advantage on me. Not ever. Watch out YOU!

Oh am such a stuphit to think that it might be the new phase of my life. But it definately has nothing to do with the new phase or whatever the marriage life since I truly deeply enjoy and happy with my married life with whom I am married to. Happy.happy.happy. :)

It's not other side of life. It's not work. It's not social. And I know I have to DITCH the pain.

Thanks.

I feel soooo relieved. Thanks to the man whom always there for me whenever I open and close my eyes. ilovyeuverryextremelysayang. =D

p/s: terima kasih tolong basuh pinggan.